Brandi Covington owns a catering company in NYC called Cooking with Cori, Cori being her very soon to be husband. Brandi is a former foster child who never finished high school. After having 3 kids, leaving her relationship, and moving into a shelter, Bran di got her GED in her early 30’s to work for the Department of Education, a job which she came to hate. Eventually she found a free program that taught her how to start her own business, and ever since she and Cori have been killing it in the kitchen. How’d she make the change? With a SERIOUS amount of self-awareness and emotional intelligence.
Brandi Covington owns a catering company in NYC called Cooking with Corey, Corey being her very soon to be husband. Brandi is a former foster child who never finished high school. After having 3 kids, leaving her relationship, and moving into a shelter, Brandi got her GED in her early 30’s to work for the Department of Education, a job which she came to hate. Eventually she found a free program that taught her how to start her own business, and ever since she and Corey have been killing it in the kitchen. How’d she make the change? With a SERIOUS amount of self-awareness and emotional intelligence.
https://www.cookingwithcorey.com/
01:28.58
Brandi
Hi my name is brandy I am an entrepreneur a mom and soon to be wife.
01:56.72
jellyfishind
Um, oh hi congratulations when are you getting married. Oh my goodness like very soon that's exciting. Wow Oh my gosh and is that go it where is the wedding.
02:05.32
Brandi
Super soon. Yes, it is. It's gonna be in New York where we live Jamaica queens. Yeah, thank you.
02:33.76
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, also that's so exciting congratulations. Um, okay so you're and are you in Jamaica queens right now is that we and flashing. Okay I love flashing i.
02:46.60
Brandi
I'm actually in flushing
03:08.82
jellyfishind
Used to live in New York did I tell you that? Brooklyn and Williamsburg yeah I'm in Chicago now I'm in the city. Yeah, it's been 90 here for the past three days so it's he.
02:56.24
Brandi
I Think so which part Oh yeah, you did You did tell me that yes you did and where are you now again. Oh okay, colds. Um, oh that's Great. That's better than here.
03:48.16
jellyfishind
Yeah I know I I was texting with my New York friends and they were like it's got kind of chilly here at 60 Yeah, well, it's coming. It should be coming your way because I think it always goes that direction I don't know usually does.
03:43.60
Brandi
It is I'm surprised to hear that you guys are at 90 and we're not close. Yeah. Yeah, it's heading this way because it's warming up. It's just not that warm.
04:27.10
jellyfishind
Yeah, um I like to think of myself as a armchair weather expert I'm obsessed with that and I also um because I miss New York so much even though I've been here for seven and a half years by now.
04:26.30
Brandi
Um.
04:46.88
Brandi
Wow.
05:03.76
jellyfishind
Um, but I'm always like checking and like what's the weather in New York today like what am I missing. Is it better here is a better New York yeah anyway so all right? So and you say you're getting married in June you have three kids right.
04:58.60
Brandi
Um, just yeah, just for the front of it.
05:21.20
Brandi
Yeah, 6 actually I have 3 of my own and then the president I'm marrying has 3 of it though. Yes Corey yes.
05:39.94
jellyfishind
3 kids.
05:47.10
jellyfishind
Um, holy cow sorry what's your fiancée’s name Corey okay, and you're in business together which we'll get to later. Okay, um, and pulling mackerel six kids. Okay, that sounds like fun.
06:03.52
Brandi
Yeah, this tons of fun. Yes, especially on family vacations. It's a lot of fun. It's a lot of ah it's just a lot of siblings and a lot of fun. Yeah.
06:23.80
jellyfishind
Is it fun.
06:36.92
jellyfishind
Yeah I bet it's so fun. Fun for the kids I've always had a really small family and I just have always been envious of large families.
06:41.52
Brandi
Yeah I've had a real small family too I actually was adopted and so yeah, so like this kind of thing is I love it. Yeah I have siblings siblings I have 5 siblings.
07:02.44
jellyfishind
Um, oh.
07:13.34
jellyfishind
Um, did you have do you have siblings. Um, a wow that's bigger than me. Ah.
07:16.80
Brandi
Um, yeah, but with the with the foster homes We kind of got separated so you know we haven't we didn't really grow up altogether as one. Yeah.
07:48.76
jellyfishind
Um, okay, cut it. Oh man that actually sounds really hard. Are you close with them now.
07:48.30
Brandi
Yeah, yeah, so we've um, we've can reconnected since then and so now we all talk. Um, of course we have some sibling rivalries and things like that. But yeah.
08:22.62
jellyfishind
Sure, yeah, okay, okay so you have so you have 3 kids and um, how old are they now.
08:29.80
Brandi
So my children are 22 20 and seventeen. Yes I was 21
08:49.44
jellyfishind
Um, oh Mike and this how old were you when you had your first kid. Okay, um, and can I ask their names Ivonne Isaiah and Jaden I love those names. Um.
08:58.26
Brandi
Yep Yvonne Isaiah and Jaden. Yeah I thanks.
09:27.80
jellyfishind
Okay, so cool. Um all right? So I'm just going to do a little bit of background a little bit of your background story first. Um, so first of all you say grew up in New York you went to high school there. How old were you when you left high school because I know you you said you didn't graduate from high school.
09:25.36
Brandi
Okay.
09:36.96
Brandi
Yeah, yeah, um I think I tried to stick it out to maybe even 19 trying to graduate and I just couldn't pull it off. Unfortunately, yeah.
10:18.64
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, um, okay, and then from there you worked in after school programs is that right? or was there something in between. Okay.
10:15.18
Brandi
So it's about 19 when I left.
10:30.26
Brandi
No, it was just a bunch of jobs in between so I was doing like fast food I was at Kfc at 1 point um I did some office work which was really there is very it was very.
11:12.90
jellyfishind
How I feel about a.
11:05.42
Brandi
It was just very dry and repetitive I didn't really love it. So just so just doing bouncing around doing those kind of things for a while a long while actually.
11:22.80
jellyfishind
Um, yeah. Okay, and when you became a Pe teacher around age 30 right.
11:30.90
Brandi
So I I was so this is a funny story I was playing in the park with my kids and um, there were some other kids that wanted to Play. So I you know involved them also and so a lady that worked in a college. She came to me and she was like you know you could be a gym teacher. And I'm like oh okay, so she recommended that I go to this college to become a gym teacher. So That's how I got to go to school for that. But I never actually did it. No I Never actually I went to school.
12:45.72
jellyfishind
You Oh you never actually you never actually went to school and you never actually became the Pe teacher got it. Okay and this is why you went back to get your ged first is that right? okay.
12:48.82
Brandi
I Went to school but I never actually became the Pe teacher happy yes because when I went to the school to get the information on becoming a Pe teacher. They were like okay so and to enroll you in the college. Need your Id and your high school diploma and then I was kind of like I don't have that but I had been getting along without it for so long and so yeah, so um, but it was something that I really wanted to try and I was interested in so the school was telling me like.
13:49.38
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
13:55.24
Brandi
You know we have a program here where you can get your ged so I did the program I got the ged and then I enrolled into the college straight from there and then that's when I began courses for a p teacher.
14:29.86
jellyfishind
Okay, so you went to school you went to college to become a Pe teacher but you never actually became a Pe teacher. But you okay, that's my next question.
14:29.58
Brandi
No, and I know I never actually finished either I got yeah I got in about um so I got in then I changed directions in the middle of it and I so to become a teacher like a regular teacher and ah.
15:07.46
jellyfishind
Um.
15:05.62
Brandi
It was just so hectic. It's so far back, but these are the tidbits I could remember because I also at that time was I was raising 3 children at the same time and trying to go to school and trying to work. So yeah, so when I look back now. Um.
15:35.78
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, oh my god.
15:42.78
Brandi
Ah, realize what an amazing journey that I've I've come how far I've come and you know sometimes you don't always reflect but when I have moments like this where I really look back and I'm like Wow How did I Even do that. So um, yeah, so yeah.
16:16.52
jellyfishind
Yeah, that's why we're here. How did you do this? How did you do this? Um, okay so so you didn't become a be teacher. Um, but you eventually became an after school counselor right? is that what happened.
16:31.78
Brandi
Yes, So I got yes, that's what happened I Ah I put off school for a second because at that time I was leaving the person that I had children with and um I had to go to a shelter and so school just wasn't gonna fit in that Schedule. So I said um, let me work because now I'm I'm not gonna have any income So I went to the shelter and at the time that I went to the shelter I also got a job at the local Community Center. So um, they hired me as a after school counselor.
17:54.58
jellyfishind
Okay.
17:46.60
Brandi
And even yeah and even then it was like 20 hours a week for like ¢8050
18:05.54
jellyfishind
Um, oh my goodness. How long what? how long did you work there.
18:00.40
Brandi
I worked there for a while I started out as the left school counselor which is just someone who does activities with the kids and then I was promoted to a coordinator. They have a program called young young men's initiative and then they put me to head that. And then I actually got another promotion and I became the assistant director and so yeah, so that happened over the course of maybe 3 to 5 years I would say yeah and then I left there because I actually got an opportunity to become after school director.
18:55.30
jellyfishind
Um, throughout.
19:06.80
jellyfishind
Um, okay.
19:25.42
jellyfishind
Okay, and that was your your a director and then from there you went to work for the department of education is that right? okay.
19:13.40
Brandi
And so that was my next stop.
19:28.60
Brandi
Right? Yes, so a friend of mine. She worked in the Doe. She told me that someone was looking for a parent coordinator which is kind of what I do but not on the front line with the kids more on the front line with the parents and so I transferred to that job. And didn't love it. It was just really different from what I was used to at after school I was a lot older so it was um, it was a well let's say the principal in the school was treating me like a person who just had no clue of anything.
20:48.14
jellyfishind
Um, and you were you were like in in your late 30 s by now right? like 39 okay
20:42.80
Brandi
Yeah, yeah, So I'd come from being the person to run the show to a position where it was just like yeah do this and do that and do it this way and do it that way and I just wasn't comfortable with it and and my age did pay a factor I Have to say that. I Felt like at my age this is not the kind of place that I want to work in This is not how I want to be spoken to this is how I want to be treated in a job.
23:21.58
jellyfishind
Um, all right anyway so you were um so you were working for them and you weren't really enjoying it because they were kind of treating you like you were like a first year intern or something and you were like I have all this experience. What.
23:31.60
Brandi
Right? Yes, exactly that's exactly how I felt I'm like I have a lot of experience. They didn't trust me to do the job and I was doing a really great job to be honest. Ah so it just it didn't work out and so I wanted to go back to after school.
24:08.38
jellyfishind
Yeah.
24:09.56
Brandi
And um in the midst of that my housing where I lived in Nature New York City housing authority they started a program where if you made food you can join this program and then they would show you how to start a food business and so yeah, so while I was yeah.
24:49.92
jellyfishind
Yeah, and that was called the pathway program is that okay.
24:48.14
Brandi
The pathways program. Yep, that was it so and it changed my life I could truly say that and they emailed me just like being on the nija email list and they email you tons of different things. Tons of different opportunities that they have with the city.
25:07.46
jellyfishind
Um, how did you find that program.
25:22.16
Brandi
Um, jobs and all kinds of things like that and so I happened to run across this on a day where I was really feeling desperate to get out of that job and I was saying like there has to be something else I could do It has to be something better than this and um I didn't know what I was gonna do in between.
25:35.70
jellyfishind
Um, okay.
26:00.46
Brandi
Leaving there and finding the other job because I wasn't gonna wait until I found another job to leave because I couldn't take it that long. Yeah.
26:24.20
jellyfishind
Oh man I've felt that feeling before it's so hard. How how like scary or I don't know how what was that feeling like like knowing like I can't stay here anymore and also I don't know what I'm going to do like what was that like.
26:45.72
Brandi
It's it's really scary. It's um and you feel doubtful because you don't know if you're gonna be able to do it. You don't know what that's gonna look like and you know you have plenty of people and they think like oh it's a city job. You're so lucky and blah blah blah. It's just like.
27:33.36
jellyfishind
Right.
27:21.26
Brandi
Lucky but not happy and yeah, just waking up and not not looking forward to going to work looking for any reason to call out any reason to not go in. So um, luckily for me I did have someone at home Corey which eventually you know will get to.
27:52.72
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
27:56.74
Brandi
Ah, the huge part he plays in in the success of the entrepreneurship. Um, but luckily for me I had someone to say like if you really need to to leave this then you know go for it but being so independent even having someone it still was very scary.
28:30.34
jellyfishind
Um, yeah. Yeah, Ah, of course did you have any sort of like like obligatory feelings about staying staying and keeping the job because it was a job or.
28:54.86
Brandi
Yeah, a few actually one because my friend had been the person to really kind of recommend me so it was just like ah I didn't want that and then also even though Courtney said that it was okay.
29:19.94
jellyfishind
And.
29:27.70
Brandi
Ah, wanted to also feel like I was pulling my own weight. There's 6 children between us. So. It's a lot to put that on 1 person you know, even if they're you know if they're saying that it's okay, but it's it's another thing when the money has to start being spent and things have to start being paid for. So I kind of was very worried about that.
30:16.74
jellyfishind
Yeah, um, but so then you found or you were emailed about the pathway program and what happened what? what did you feel like when you read when Reds email.
30:25.78
Brandi
I kind of just felt like you know I'll try anything. That's that's really how I felt and um I had an idea of a 4 to make cupcakes and I didn't follow through with it because I didn't know how to register the business and I was really confused.
30:48.52
jellyfishind
Yeah.
31:02.36
Brandi
It was a lot of stuff that I didn't understand so I had backed off from the idea So when I saw this I was like oh you know maybe I can go back to the cupcakes now and see if this will help me find find out how to register the business and get through all the red tape. So I went to the program and um.
31:49.60
jellyfishind
Um, okay, and it was you said about six weeks long
31:36.74
Brandi
And it did exactly that for me, it was about six weeks if I remember correctly and it was twice a week for 4 hours in the evening. Um, yeah I was going there in the day and then going to the program at night.
32:06.22
jellyfishind
Um, Wow and you were still working at the other place while you were going through the program. Yeah, okay and is this a program like you have to apply to it or you just could sign up.
32:13.62
Brandi
Yeah, you you applied to it they and after you send in like some information about why you want to do cooking What have you done already. They call you Yeah, that's my doorbell really? yeah so um.
32:44.38
jellyfishind
Um I hear charm I hear chimes. Sorry what is up Ah, that's okay.
32:52.24
Brandi
Yeah, so they you send in some information they ask you some questions and if they like you then they call you in you have another interview a 1 on one interview. It's the same kind of thing and then you be enrolled then you get enrolled in for program from there and then it's the criteria is not extremely. High because they know that you're a person who's starting a business so you know they don't put a heavy weight of requirements on you 100 % totally free yes yep
33:46.58
jellyfishind
Um, right? and it's free. It's a free program that's amazing. That's incredible and then do so they do they kind of teach you How to either start a business or. Like get certain jobs or how what it What else is it So man says okay.
34:18.42
Brandi
So It's really focused on so Starting. Um, starting your own Business. So the workshops like centered around how to get your paperwork done what you need to do that. Um, how to look for customers. When you find customers some of the the key factors in keeping customers and gaining more customers and how to deal with yourself in in spaces where you can get customers. It really is. It's so it's I can truly say it changed my life.
35:19.62
jellyfishind
Um, this is an amazing program. Um, yeah, how um I wanted to know like what what changed for you mentally I guess first because we're gonna obviously talk more about how it actually changed your life.
35:37.10
Brandi
Well first of all I felt more um, knowledgeable about starting the business helping getting through the red tape and um I felt more confident in going after this goal whereas originally I kind of just gave up on it because I I didn't know. Where I was going with it and so this was the guidance was really helpful.
36:35.82
jellyfishind
Yeah, that makes sense. Um, okay so you finished this job. Are you finished the program and then you quit your job right away or was a little.
36:44.00
Brandi
Yeah, and yeah I quit almost right away I think I had maybe 1 or 2 more classes to go and then I quit I had said a last day. Maybe um I'd said a last day I gave them a two weeks notice but I didn't even make the two weeks
37:31.74
jellyfishind
Um, yeah I feel like that's pretty normal like once people quit they're sort of just like they're mentally out already Anyway, which I think is a reason why like I know a lot of like big like companies.
37:20.44
Brandi
I couldn't even get through the two weeks it was really just that bad. So um, yeah.
37:45.12
Brandi
Yeah.
38:10.88
jellyfishind
Once you quit they'll just tell you to leave right? Then they'll be like okay fine. You're leaving then get your stuff and go today because they kind of know you're just mentally checked out. That's normal. There's no point.
38:08.64
Brandi
Yeah, there's no, there's no point and so they I mean they allowed me to say the two weeks but I just know I just couldn't take it.
38:35.48
jellyfishind
Yeah, so so okay, so you quit um and you finish this program So you're feeling like okay maybe I can do this I got this like I have a better understanding of what I need to do to start my own business in particular and doing these cupcakes which you said.
39:01.34
Brandi
Um, yeah, thank you.
39:14.74
jellyfishind
Were called tainted treats which is so cute. Um, um, but like what else were you feeling like how scared were you.
39:16.14
Brandi
So yeah, so the fear came rushing right back. So now I had no job I had this business and you know just because you start a business does not necessarily mean you're gonna make money. So um I kind of just went into a frenzy like I have to find people to buy cupcake cupcakes and I ah.
39:47.34
jellyfishind
Right.
39:52.92
Brandi
Really pushing the issue really trying to find customers because you know you have that fear of now like what if it doesn't work what if nobody nobody wants to buy it What if I um you know what? if I can't do it What if I do get a large order and I can't make all the cupcakes you know all the fear and negative.
40:16.10
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
40:31.74
Brandi
Thoughts come rushing to you and like how am I going to support myself while am I doing while while I'm doing this like is this a joke have I lied to myself. Yeah.
40:58.78
jellyfishind
Yes, all of those feelings. Oh my God So familiar. So how what did you do like because I think a lot of times those feelings can be really debilitating and like just you know.
41:11.40
Brandi
Um, yes.
41:31.32
jellyfishind
How did you move through it like what did you do to keep yourself going and moving forward.
41:24.64
Brandi
I Mean honestly I just push through it just keep trying keep keep trying keep trying and kind of not trying to block those negative thoughts out. Because it like you said they can be debilitating if you sit in that thought so like as they were running through my head I kind of just let them keep passing by but never really stopping and focusing on any of them.
42:30.80
jellyfishind
That's so smart like not pushing them away but like letting them like kind of run through you because they're gonna come. They're gonna come. There's no way to get around it. So um, where do you think your bravery comes from.
42:24.66
Brandi
Right is no way to get around it.
42:47.38
Brandi
I Guess probably I would say just being forced to child and I think I think people would think of it as a negative situation and it was ah a really rough time but I don't know if that was the higher powers. Prepping me for what was to come because there's so much of my of every of my resilience that came from that time in my life that I am constantly using in this time in my life. So just like really pushing through really trying to understand who I am. Understanding what it is that I want for myself. What kind of life. Do I want when I'm talking about happiness and um, being fulfilled and so you know a lot of not being heard a lot of being passed up by people may have considered adopting you but then changing their mind. Ah I don't know how to describe it but I I would say it's kind of like trying to claw my way to the top and just constantly cloying and just keep trying just keeping to just trying to continue to survive the best way that I know how.
45:21.74
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
45:14.50
Brandi
And it was just so heavy on me that even when I was um, somewhat successful I still was in Survival Mode. You know it didn't turn off I didn't realize like you know now I I don't have to claw on my way to the top I'm here I can walk around a little bit I can check out the sites. And it took a really long time for me to to for it to dawn on me that I was not in survival mode anymore. It was okay to buy that thing that I wanted that was a little overpriced. It was okay to say no to people if. That wasn't working for my time and my schedule and you just learn a lot from it.
46:46.96
jellyfishind
Yeah, do you think that you'll ever sort of completely let go of that survival mode or do you think that you'll always just sort of hold on to like but this could all go away any minute.
46:56.18
Brandi
Yes, yeah I think coming out of that survival mode. That's the next thought like I could lose it at any minute. So if survival is just kind of like I just want to keep maintaining like I just want to keep being okay, keep making it to the next day and then when you get past that part now it's like I'm making it to the next day I'm not going to sleep with tons of worries on my mind I'm waking up in a good mood I'm not worried about how am I gonna eat. How are the children gonna eat. How am I gonna get the rent paid. What bill is gonna show up at my door today that I cannot pay. So once you get past that then the next thing is like. Now I can feed the kids every day I can feed myself every day I know how I'm gonna pay my rent I can take care of a bill if it comes out of nowhere but how long is this gonna last that becomes the next thing just from being so used to not having that kind of space in my life just wondering. When um when is it gonna be taken away from me and then the pandemic hit and everything stopped and so I was like okay here here's the moment when it's gonna be taken away from me. Yes.
49:03.90
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
49:19.48
jellyfishind
Right? right? And yet you're still here so proof that like you've done it before and you you done it again and you can do it again if you have to in the future like you're never going to go back there? Yeah um man. Okay, so.
49:26.20
Brandi
Very much so exactly exactly.
49:54.82
jellyfishind
You Um, just like moving backwards a little bit and you were you so you were completely like um, you're creating a completely new life for yourself. You were creating a life for yourself Professionally and personally um, you were.
49:53.36
Brandi
Um, yeah.
50:05.88
Brandi
Um, yeah, yes.
50:31.94
jellyfishind
Starting a career and you were dating. Um, how did you meet Corey oh how'd that work.
50:30.80
Brandi
Actually made him on Facebook. Yeah so a mutual a mutual friend had put up a post and he had commented something that was kind of funny and so I commented it something and then he wrote me in a private message and then the rest was history from there.
51:15.12
jellyfishind
Um, ah wow. It's like a not such a modern romance.
51:08.20
Brandi
Yeah, yeah I mean didn't always feel like it. It was a little rough for us in the beginning. Um, he just had been a single person for really long and I had been um, a little bit over the dating scene. Ah so when we first got together. It was not. We kind of went backwards. We're doing really well now obviously because we're getting married and we we had to really learn each Other. We really had to understand what the other person was coming from ah before we could really get to this stage and it was just it was a lot in the beginning. Ah, lot of me being way too independent thinking that I don't need anyone or anyone not really trusting anyone to take care of me. So um, you know we had to really fight our way to some kind of common ground.
52:56.36
jellyfishind
How did you move past that like how did you figure out how to trust and sort of let go of some of that. Um.
53:00.50
Brandi
Ah, um I think a lot of it was him just being consistent eventually becoming consistent because he did not start out that way. Um, and then also just getting out of my own head and really saying to myself like ease up a little bit a little bit. A little bit at a time and and and the more I kind of let go and he picked up the slack. It became a little bit easier for me but also being very gentle with him because he also didn't necessarily trust the situation or didn't really know what to expect from it either.
54:04.78
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
54:15.96
Brandi
And so I also had to ah lean in a little bit and be consistent myself because um, that was hard for me to be consistent because I just was taking care of myself and my children for so long and it was just like you know I don't I don't really need you here I Just want you here and it was just like and I would say things like that and it would just kind of. Could see the defeat on his face and so me just really paying attention and um, seeing his reaction to me when I said certain things and I did certain things and kind of taking a mental note of that and just saying like okay well you know maybe I don't need to say that again. Maybe I don't need to do that again.
55:39.00
jellyfishind
Ah, um, that's like it sounds like you have incredible just awareness like in the moment you know self-awareness and also just like a awareness of the room in the people I just I think that like a lot of people don't.
55:31.34
Brandi
So yeah.
56:18.32
jellyfishind
Have that or don't bother to pay attention or I don't know.
56:10.50
Brandi
I Don't know if people just don't really I think because I've had to do it so much growing up being aware of myself and the people I'm around and trying to you know feeling like a little kid who was like me against the world and constantly having to protect myself and be aware of my surrounding.
56:34.34
jellyfishind
Are.
56:48.22
Brandi
And makes it a little bit easier but being aware of your surroundings like you said you also have to be aware of the room and the people that you're engaging with and I think that I'm really aware of that because I think a lot of people drop the bowl with me but that being aware of me and what I needed and what I wanted and so I kind of just. Wanted to make sure that I was never being the person being that person to anyone else. Yeah.
57:45.38
jellyfishind
Um, that makes so much sense. Um I'm trying to figure out where I want to go next with with that I have so many questions. Um, so like in the transition.
57:57.28
Brandi
If acts the way you.
58:25.22
jellyfishind
In this like transitional time meeting Corey figuring that out and figuring out the um, your new career path. What were some of your internal conversations like around this time like. What sort of doubts did you have what sort of hopes did you have.
58:47.88
Brandi
So for personally and professionally I think the doubts are always heavy when you're changing if you're involving yourself with a new person if you're involving yourself with a new job, especially 1 of entrepreneurship because there's no guarantees. You know if you work with someone. You know you're guaranteed that paycheck every two weeks or a week even if it's not the ideal amount that you hope for at least you know that you're guaranteed that every week whereas entrepreneurship. It's like it could work. It might not work. You never know and then when you get involved with a new person. It's the same kind of thing you don't know if it's gonna work or if it's not gonna work especially based on a lot of the things that you've already come from and then being a person with 3 children is like is anyone gonna even want me because I'm a package deal I'm actually 4 people when you get with me.
01:00:51.92
jellyfishind
Um, right? Ah yeah, and and while this was going on like what kind of things would you tell your kids while you were like trying to navigate through all of this change.
01:00:43.24
Brandi
So um.
01:01:03.10
Brandi
Well just trying to be really honest with them just telling them that the situation that I was in just it wasn't working. It doesn't make anyone bad it just stop working and so you know we have to try something new asking them their opinions on you know people that I met. Introducing them as friends not necessarily a boyfriend all a lover but just you know trying to see how they felt about things um because it's new for all of us even them and again from my past of being just constantly moved around and not knowing. Where I'm going who I'm going to meet what my day is gonna look like what these people that I'm being introduced to what role are they going to play in my life now I just did not want that for them and that's why I said I don't know if there was a higher power just taking me through those stages of my life so that I can be prepared now. Because that has been so beneficial for my children to really kind of feel like they're alone for the ride with me not being left out like ah you know this is a new person and they're just here and they have ah many questions of who is this person what does this mean for us is this person gonna come between us and mommy. So just kind of letting them know like they have they have first dibs on you know what? they think and that that it matters what they think it matters if they want this person around it matters if they don't feel comfortable and so just kind of have my personal conversations with them.
01:04:16.22
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, um I love that that you just seem like such a like gentle caring, thoughtful human and and I love the idea that like you know that.
01:04:07.18
Brandi
And I think that was really helpful.
01:04:26.88
Brandi
Thank you.
01:04:51.68
jellyfishind
What you went through was just preparing you for now and I think it's such an optimistic view and um and it's kind of inspiring and I agree like I Think. Life could be easier for a lot of people and also of course like everything we go through is I always say like it's a learning journey and we're gathering information and um, yeah, So yeah.
01:05:19.60
Brandi
Yeah, yeah.
01:05:30.36
Brandi
I Wanted to ax you to because for me I think based on what you just said for me I think Mindset is like everything. It's a big like that's a big part of how you're gonna get through so with you changing your path. Do you feel like Mindset played a big role in giving you The. Ah, courage to really do this thing that you're doing now.
01:06:24.16
jellyfishind
Every it's everything my mindset it's everything and I am really fortunate that I've been able to take some time to figure out my mindset to kind of get my mind right? Um, Thank you for asking this actually. Um. Yeah I had it's weird. It's it's almost like ah I feel like for the past probably couple of years I've been like building this very solid foundation that I didn't have before I Never really focused on Mindset. Um I mean I not that it wasn't but.
01:07:09.12
Brandi
And 5
01:07:22.52
Brandi
You don't realize it's in there. It's working though the mindset is working but you don't realize that that's playing such a huge role.
01:07:36.20
jellyfishind
Um, you don't read right? right? right? I didn't really pay attention to it I was just kind of going through life and I was doing my job and I was doing all the things that I thought I was supposed to do and then um and then yeah eventually realize like.
01:07:50.00
Brandi
Reason.
01:08:14.52
jellyfishind
There's more to this and I I know I want deeper connections with people I know I want certain things but I didn't understand how to get those things because I never really stopped to to figure out my my mindset as you say um and now I've been able to sort of slow down and take a breath and figure out like.
01:08:05.85
Brandi
Um, yeah.
01:08:53.38
jellyfishind
Am I Really like what is my identity you know because um, and and I talk about this a little bit on here like you know I think we often think our identity is what we do for a living or who we are in relationship with if we're a parent you know I'm a mom I'm a wife I'm a you know.
01:08:43.12
Brandi
Um, yeah.
01:09:18.80
Brandi
Yeah.
01:09:32.54
jellyfishind
Career person. Whatever um and then what happens when those things go away what happens when you you know, break up with your partner or you lose a job then what happens to your identity and and that's when we like get become really lost and depressed and down and it's like no no, no like that's not.
01:09:41.54
Brandi
Yes.
01:10:12.40
jellyfishind
For me anyway like my identity is I'm a you know creative curious, kind, thoughtful person I want I want to be as vulnerable as possible. Um I think it's really important to like be open and honest and tell our stories. That's who I am.
01:10:21.60
Brandi
My.
01:10:49.88
jellyfishind
Those are my values and I couldn't apply that to anything in my life I can apply that to my career I can apply that to my relationships I can apply that to anything and so yeah and so that's what I've been able to do recently sort of shift my mindset and like create that build that.
01:10:45.36
Brandi
Absolutely absolutely.
01:11:22.74
jellyfishind
Foundation. So now I can go out into the world and I feel like my mindset is different like I know who I am so if I get into conflict with somebody or if I'm in a situation I don't necessarily feel comfortable like I at least can like stay centered with like I know who I am.
01:11:40.14
Brandi
Um, who you are as as in it as an individual single person I actually um I'm part of a woman's group is called Wow woman of worth which was started by my best friend. So.
01:12:02.80
jellyfishind
Yeah.
01:12:11.84
jellyfishind
Um, how cool.
01:12:11.24
Brandi
And so and we do themes every year and that was one of the themes that we were We were discussing discussing who are you which is like who are you when you strip away those titles when you strip away those um degrees when you strip away those children who are you as an individual. What what? What is it about you and.
01:12:54.52
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
01:12:50.68
Brandi
How do you feel with that. Do you feel like less of a person if you don't have the proper education. Do you feel like less of a person if you're not married by a certain age and um, like you said I kind of knew who I was as an individual and respected who I was as an individual and. In the group. It kind of like opened my eyes to realize like you know this is my mindset. This is not really about.. It's not really about. Um if I'm struggling or not.. It's just how am I looking at it. How am I looking at it from a perspective of who I am not what people want me to be not. This perfect mother is perfect um person and I'm doing this job because it's the city job and it's gonna allow me to have money when I retire like in this neat little package which everyone expects and that was the biggest thing like are you gonna leave a city job to try to make cupcakes is that.
01:14:55.28
jellyfishind
Right.
01:14:43.71
Brandi
That's insane but me as an individual Yes I'm a risk taker. Yes I Want to be happy I Want to do things that will allow me to do the things that I want to do in my life and that means sometimes it's not going to look the way other people want it to look and you have to be willing to do that. You have to be willing to take that chance.
01:15:37.64
jellyfishind
Ah yes I Love this I'm so excited to be talking to you about this right now. Um, and thank you for sharing this I Also just want to say and I hope I don't know I want to say like I talked to a lot of people obviously on here and I think a lot of people I talked to come from definitely like a place of.
01:15:32.10
Brandi
Yes.
01:16:15.72
jellyfishind
Privilege including me and I so I talk you know and so a lot of my friends or people who listen to the podcast are like Yay Yeah, like change is fine for you but like I I don't have that luxury I have kids to take care of or I have you know and I have bills to pay I'm you know. Struggling with this is and that and like all like very valid. Yes, yeah, of course 100% Um, and it's just interesting. It's just interesting to or I'm really really glad to be talking to you um to just to see a slightly different perspective.
01:16:42.30
Brandi
Points out.
01:17:10.56
Brandi
Um, yeah, it makes sense I understand exactly what you're saying and do you feel like ah if someone is somewhat privileged. Do you feel like maybe you know they have um.
01:17:27.46
jellyfishind
This make sense. Yeah, um, any yeah.
01:17:47.56
Brandi
Like to in my head I think like someone who's privileged. Maybe maybe they are more willing to step out because they know they may have something to lean back on. Yeah, that's the what I'm looking for.
01:18:17.44
jellyfishind
Yeah, there's a there's a there's a bigger safety Net I mean you know? Um, yeah, there's ah, there's a bigger safety net um you know, whatever for whatever reasons if you come from you know money or lots of.
01:18:38.86
Brandi
I mean for me just having parents you know for me when I left the relationship I had nowhere to go it was it was either the streets or the shelter it was that I didn't have parents that I could go and live with with my 3 children if I if I changed my job and I don't have a paycheck.
01:18:53.74
jellyfishind
Reasons that were privilegeed written. Yeah. How yes.
01:19:29.82
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
01:19:17.84
Brandi
I Can't borrow money from anyone. There's there's no where to get it from if if I don't feed these kids They don't eat and it's it's that kind of thing.
01:19:45.42
jellyfishind
Yes, shit. Yeah yeah, just having parents fuck. Um.
01:19:39.60
Brandi
Yeah, and it's something that my kids don't have to think about because they have me so and and you know I want it to be that way. But you know I It's just something that I realize is a big deal because I have a lot of friends that are like you know I'm an ask my mom. She's gonna lend me the money. I'm gonna go live back home and it's just like when I reflect back I'm like why did I didn't even have those options and so you don't even realize you know how you know how wonderful some things are.
01:20:37.54
jellyfishind
Yeah. Um, yeah.
01:20:57.74
jellyfishind
Yeah, you're incredible I was so so inspired by you. Um, yeah, you're you're amazing and incredibly brave I mean any it changes hard and and it requires bravery for anybody wherever you are.
01:20:49.78
Brandi
Thank you.
01:21:14.52
Brandi
I Think so yeah, regardless of your privilege to to live your life The way that you see fit is is brave in itself I know a lot of people who stay in jobs or stay in relationships based on the fact that they're worried about what people will think.
01:21:33.74
jellyfishind
And regardless, yeah.
01:21:53.60
Brandi
Or how they will look in those type of situations they spend. Um they invest a lot of time so they feel like they're obligated to stay at a job or obligated to stay in a relationship because of the amount of time that they spent and really, you're not. And did you did you feel that way when you left your job did you were you working in that space for a really long time.
01:22:51.84
jellyfishind
Um, yeah I was in the wine industry. Um for about thirteen or so years um I lost my job during the pandemic and I was yeah and I was um I was lucky because um.
01:22:51.40
Brandi
Ah Wow I didn't know that.
01:23:27.74
jellyfishind
Got unemployment and I um and I had some money saved up and so I was like all right I can actually take this time to figure out what I really want to do I had thought um for a while I write for a little while that I was getting sort of I Love the wine industry for a lot of reasons and I was like I don't know this is bored and. It's I'm getting bored and also um and also it's really unhealthy industry and it's just hard on your body and I was like I am getting older and I don't think I can keep up with this forever. So um, so yeah I mean it but it was.
01:24:04.16
Brandi
Um, okay yeah.
01:24:42.22
jellyfishind
And I know I'm forgetting what you just asked me I'm not used to being on this side of the conversation. Oh no, no, no, no, don't apologize I'm I'm grateful that you're asking me questions nobody ever asked me questions. Ah.
01:24:30.24
Brandi
He oh oh I'm sorry I just I'm if oh especially as 2 women you know and you you. Doing the same thing that I've done I'm just curious to see because sometimes it's a little lonely up there when you are a person who will make changes or will take chances. Um, it gets a little lonely because you it's hard to find people who can relate.
01:25:47.40
jellyfishind
Um, oh yeah, it's it can be really lonely and really scary and yeah and I think you can often feel sort of misunderstood. Um, and by friends who like have no idea what I'm doing and they think I'm crazy and they're.
01:25:51.92
Brandi
Yes.
01:26:24.88
jellyfishind
Like what you're doing what now and like why and how are you making money and like win you know and and there's also um I think that for me like we talked about identity and I've struggled with that too because I was known you know to so many friends of mine and also just friends in my.
01:26:17.56
Brandi
Right.
01:27:01.92
jellyfishind
In the wine industry like I was known as a wine professional and that's how people knew me on social media and like just all the things and so now I'm still still struggle with it. Um, just kind of showing up is like I make podcasts now and I talk to people about like psychology and.
01:26:51.98
Brandi
Um, yeah.
01:27:15.12
Brandi
I.
01:27:41.60
jellyfishind
That's what I you know and it's just like what are people? What are you thinking of me right now like do they think I'm crazy. Do they not believe me, do they not like you talked about it a little bit too like you know to yeah like when.
01:27:41.20
Brandi
Right? Yeah, but do do you get those people where it's like I'm like I work for myself I'm I'm a catorer and then I I still have people that's like yeah, but what like what do you? where do you work and it's like.
01:28:24.20
jellyfishind
Um, right is ah.
01:28:19.90
Brandi
But myself I'm a caterer and some people are still like no, but what? what is your? what is your everyday job. So it's like you know people do have a tendency to not yeah they don't some people do have a tendency to not get it sometimes.
01:28:40.88
jellyfishind
Um, race. But what do you do all day long. Yeah, yeah I have um, a good friend of mine who's also like she used to work in the wine industry with me and she's working on on a startup company and she's been working on it for um, a couple of years but but was overlapped with her old job.
01:29:03.40
Brandi
Okay.
01:29:38.18
jellyfishind
Um, and so it's really nice to have her because we talk to a lot. We talk about the struggles. We talk about the loneliness and the identity stuff and it's It's really nice to like have that person to yeah who who does get it. But it's she's really the only one she'll call me up and.
01:29:28.98
Brandi
My yeah.
01:30:13.20
jellyfishind
Some days and she'll be like don't give up and like don't give up you know and I'll do the same for her because you need that.
01:30:05.16
Brandi
Yeah, do you feel like you find a lot of rough days I mean in the beginning It was really rough just like should I Just go back. You know do you have did have you have had moments where you were like. Let me go back to the wine.
01:30:41.56
jellyfishind
Oh yes, oh yes, oh my gosh. Yes I mean I Yeah I think about that all the time and in fact I've had like couple of opportunities not like full-on job offers. But like people who are like hey like I know of this job offer or this job opening and you'd probably be.
01:30:55.60
Brandi
Right.
01:31:20.88
jellyfishind
Good at it like you you know and I and I'm like I know I could get that job I should just get that job I would have like a steady income I'd work you know, like yes, all of that was done. What am I doing right now. This is so stupid Just go get the other job and I haven't yet. Um and I know that it's there like if I I think if I want to.
01:31:22.60
Brandi
Um, yeah.
01:31:44.80
Brandi
Right.
01:31:59.24
jellyfishind
Go back. But I ultimately am like no I don't want to do that I know I'm very clear that I do not want to do that anymore. I know that I'm just going to fall back into all those old patterns that felt unhealthy and that you know frankly we're just unfulfilling and kind of boring at times. Um.
01:31:55.60
Brandi
Yeah.
01:32:13.28
Brandi
Um, yeah.
01:32:33.82
jellyfishind
There were wonderful things about it Truly I Loved a lot about it. But um, yeah I have those doubts all the time like I should just go do this other thing like also the other thing too is that like I think to myself and this is sort of the same thing but like why do I do this to myself like.
01:32:31.80
Brandi
Yeah.
01:32:55.14
Brandi
Um.
01:33:13.76
jellyfishind
Make this so hard for myself I could just like plenty of people I have a lot of friends in the wine industry who have like steady jobs and they're very happy and fulfilled and they love it and they have like a much easier time and here I am and I'm like.
01:33:14.86
Brandi
Yeah.
01:33:44.24
jellyfishind
Struggling and I have all these I'm full of doubt all the time and I have down days and I have updates and it's like why am I doing this to myself. But for some reason I I want I I need more I guess I Um I want more out of life I don't.
01:33:45.96
Brandi
Well why do you think it is is it.
01:34:21.56
jellyfishind
Feel I don't you know when the minute I get complacent or I'm not being challenged or stretched I just feel like I have so much to give to the world and I feel like it's such. It would be such a shame to not try to um, do to give it to do to.
01:34:21.92
Brandi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:34:40.18
Brandi
Give it yeah because when you get into a regular job. There is your the creativity is stifled and the the time that you can forget forget about your time. Um it it just it. It takes over.
01:35:00.68
jellyfishind
To do that and and.
01:35:19.64
Brandi
Your whole life and it's really hard to do anything else because you know when you come home. You're exhausted then you have to get up and do it again when your weekends come. It's just like I just need I want these two days I don't want to do anything I don't want to think and before you know you're back to Monday. So.
01:35:55.72
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's so true. It's that routine that's sort of like is stifling and create in like and your creativity.
01:35:54.58
Brandi
Be creative. It's really hard to do that when you're working for. Um, yeah, it's it's hard. Yeah.
01:36:35.34
jellyfishind
I think there is also something ah 1 more thing and I really want to get back to you? Um I think there's also something about like there's like a romance I have like a somewhat like romantic view of just like what our life is supposed to look like and um and I think that you know.
01:36:29.62
Brandi
Yeah, yeah.
01:37:13.12
jellyfishind
I Don't know if that's realistic I Think that's realistic I mean I'm and I'm making it happen but um, but I think you know that includes just like having being being able to create being able to connect with people create community um or the community that I you know want to create and having an impact.
01:37:00.48
Brandi
Um, way.
01:37:32.68
Brandi
Um, right.
01:37:52.74
jellyfishind
In some way and like doing it on my time and really being seen and heard the way I want to be seen in her. You know there's all like this like a little bit of romance in it. But what do you? Yes, yeah, it's so important. Yeah.
01:37:43.48
Brandi
Um, yes, yes, and the freedom to self care when needed. You know? Yeah I Totally agree.
01:38:31.26
jellyfishind
Um, good questions. Um, okay so wait getting back to you still so you met Cory and you're out of this program. You were looking for um places that would hire you to to to make cupcakes right? Um, and eventually you found.
01:38:23.86
Brandi
Yeah.
01:38:48.10
Brandi
Yes, yeah.
01:39:11.24
jellyfishind
And Corey did we say Cory's also a cater or he was already. He's a chef. Okay, um, how perfect that you met.
01:39:02.74
Brandi
Yeah, he was a Chef. He's been Yeah, he's He's never had a different job other than cooking. Yeah so he's been cooking on his Life. Yep. We talk about that all the time like it couldn't have been no other way it couldn't have been no other way so he was Starting. He was um, he was starting to do like catering gigs for people.
01:39:49.78
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, assembly.
01:40:02.26
Brandi
And I'm like you know I'm really good with the um with the websites and stuff like that something that he's also good at but um I had more time so I was like you know build you a website for your cooking with Corey and um, we kind of put it out. There wasn't really doing anything and then um. I was looking for cupcake gigs and I was on Craigslist and there was someone who was looking for um a caterer and so I wrote the school and I was saying that um you know um looking for places to sell my cupcakes and you know I would love to cater for you and they were saying like no, we're looking for food. We need to feed our students so I was like oh yeah, we do we do food too and so I geared him towards the cooking mcquarie website and um. And then he was like you know you guys come in and we'll talk about what we want what we're looking for and it just so happened that Corey was working for a company that did that same kind of thing like a meal prep type of thing and so we came in. We had the interview and um, they decided to work with us from there.
01:42:09.68
jellyfishind
Are.
01:42:14.54
Brandi
And so me and Cory were talking and we were just saying like look if we're gonna do this. We need to really do this. We need to be committed to our relationship like you know I don't want to start anything and then it becomes like where we hate each other or the relationship is terrible and now we're working together and then it becomes like a big mess. So we really. Sat down and had a conversation about really committing ourselves to each other and to the work if that's what we were gonna do and so we've been at the school for almost six years now we've been doing it ever since then and then we picked up tons of like daycares and we get people who call us just for catering. Also so um.
01:43:43.12
jellyfishind
Um, that's amazing. How do you? How do you separate the relationship from the work is that hard. Ah.
01:43:30.22
Brandi
Really took off.
01:43:46.56
Brandi
Sometimes sometimes we don't. But um, like you said a lot of it is our individuality because he's just naturally a hard worker. He's the kind of person who will if he has something to do. He's gonna get it done and um also I'm the same way when it.
01:44:28.96
jellyfishind
Um, and then.
01:44:43.54
jellyfishind
I was just gonna say like the same type of reason.
01:44:38.76
Brandi
Yeah, So the fact that we were like that as individuals it worked for us to come together and and work together and it's not always easy. We We bump head some time and sometimes I'm you know I'm kind of like am I am I Just your working partner. You know sometimes. To remind him about the romance you know?? um because I want to be honest I don't want to say that this is perfect and everything's perfect and we just make money and we just live together and everything's Perfect. It's It's not like that you know sometimes we have to actually carve time out for our relationship because we are so busy I'm doing. The part of the work where um, I'm dealing with the customers and um, the staff at the school his part of the work is really focused on the cooking and the chefs and making sure that we're getting. We're meeting all the orders that we need So We're um, we're separate a lot. And a lot of our conversations are about work and food and feeding people and sometimes we get lost in that so we make sure that we carve time out for each other for our family and our children and we have to be purposeful about that.
01:47:08.82
jellyfishind
Do you have like are you famous for a certain kind of food.
01:46:59.60
Brandi
Um, there's a few things that people love. We have something called Chicken Mac and it's basically macaroni and cheese with grilled chicken in it. Um, it's really I mean he makes macaroni and cheese like you know.
01:47:33.56
jellyfishind
Um, I get the um.
01:47:37.64
Brandi
Like a grandmother from down south. It has like all these different cheeses in it and it has like that brown crust on top of it and then there's like um, a season of the way that he seasons his grilled chicken is like nothing I've ever had before my life and um, he does.
01:47:51.96
jellyfishind
Yeah, guys Oh my God um.
01:48:20.86
jellyfishind
Um, like what what? how I I mean I know you probably can't give away all the secrets but you don't even know. Okay, okay.
01:48:20.64
Brandi
Honestly I don't I don't know because I'm not in the kitchen I don't do that part I'm not the you know he's the chef. So it's like um I don't know he seizes it and then he grows it to like ah almost like ah a light crunch on the chicken and then he stuffs that into the macaroni and cheese and it's like it's like crack.
01:49:04.52
jellyfishind
Oh my God sounds like cra.
01:48:56.32
Brandi
Yes, people people live for it. So I would say if we had to say something that would probably definitely be at the top of the list. But.
01:49:24.22
jellyfishind
Um, okay, wow it sounds so good and I'm starving um will you send me a picture of that Mac and cheese. Okay, oh I can look on your Instagram okay, but.
01:49:19.50
Brandi
Peak yes, meets it yes, like I can and it's it's on our it's on our Instagram also yeah.
01:50:00.72
jellyfishind
Um, looking back at all of this. What do you think your lowest point was and how did you get yourself out of it.
01:50:04.66
Brandi
Um I think ah when I left the well probably towards the end of the relationship with um, my kid's dad it just I just wasn't happy I didn't feel like myself. Um. Just felt like I didn't have a life. My whole life was based on like what was he doing where was he at why wasn't he here. Why is he answering his phone. It just was like and I just my life was just filled with trying to find that out just constantly like calling checking phones and. Becoming a crazy person and then falling down a rabbit hole of that same routine. It was just like waking up every day like what is he doing now where is he at when he's home. How can I get the phone in my hand so that I can look at it and yeah, you know and I'm ah um, ah, want to be completely honest because this is. These are the things that I was doing I don't want to say that I just was like yeah I'm out because I'm a I'm a bad chicken I wasn't gonna do it no more and I just walked out. It wasn't like that it was just it was just um, constant me.
01:52:22.80
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
01:52:22.56
Brandi
Invading privacy of another person because I felt like they were doing things to hurt me and they were and I could see that without the invasion of privacy but I wanted more proof I needed to see more and it just got to a point where I was just like yeah I was over myself. I was over all the stuff that I was doing and I and I realized like the only way to stop it was that I had to remove myself from that situation and I had nowhere to go and then I had to go to the shelter but surprisingly the shelter was not the lowest part. It was everything that I was doing before I went to the shelter that felt like the lowest part for me. Going to the shelter was actually probably the start of getting on the higher. The higher part removing myself from that nonsense but that was really the lowest part and I just felt like I had no life and I had nothing like I didn't really recognize myself.
01:54:18.92
jellyfishind
Um, thank you for sharing that what sort of example, do you hope you're setting for your children.
01:54:11.78
Brandi
Yeah.
01:54:21.28
Brandi
Um, Well what I I'm hoping that they were seeing is like if you don't like something change. It do something understand that you don't have to be in a situation because you have children because you've invested time if it's not working for you then do something else. Try something else meet other people. Um, there's um, a stigma and I don't know you know if that's something that goes on in your world but in my community there's a stigma of well I think that's just for women in general if you date a lot of people or if you are with a lot of people. Um. You know you are this promiscuous kind of person and it's just like if I meet someone? Yeah Slut yeah or a Ho and it's like you know if I stay with this person so that I don't appear to be a slut or a hole.
01:55:54.68
jellyfishind
Um, yeah I think they say slight Sometimes yeah.
01:56:15.80
Brandi
But I'm miserable. What? what's the point of that and you know I have two girls and I I want them to see that if you invest your time in a man and you have children with a man. You don't have to stay with them If You're not happy if it's not working and you have to move on then you have to move On. And that's really something that I don't want them to get caught in I know a lot of people who are in situations like that and I want them to see that you can do it and then also not getting in the the Hamster wheel of if someone thinks that a job is so Perfect. You know you're getting this.
01:57:10.76
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, yeah.
01:57:33.34
Brandi
Great amount of money you're getting all these things for when you retire like this is what you have to do you have to suppress your creativity and only do this because this will get you money. This will get you retirement and I'm just trying to teach them that there are things that you can do directly through your bank. You can get Iras you can get set up monies for your Future. You don't have to be in this corporate situation or this working for someone situation in order to save for your Future. You just have to do it young and you have to be smart about your money and so that's some of the things that I'm trying to. Teach them and that I'm hoping that they're seeing me. Do.
01:59:06.34
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, um I love that and and that idea that like we always have a choice in everything we do.
01:59:07.78
Brandi
Yes, that and that is the biggest key you can always leave something that you don't want to be a part of it whether it's a person whether it's a friend whether it's a job no matter what it is you always have the choice to not associate with something if you don't want to.
01:59:50.88
jellyfishind
Yeah, and that it that doesn't mean that it was a failure or that you're a failure. Yeah.
01:59:48.88
Brandi
Exactly exactly you know and then just trying to find the right balance. Don't go crazy with it whereas like yeah, you're not doing what I want you to do So I'm out you know, being able to really spot those people who are genuine who can add to your life.
02:00:16.92
jellyfishind
Yes, right, right. Um, yeah.
02:00:28.22
Brandi
In a way even if they're not exactly who you want them to be. You know sometimes people put their expectations on people and when they're not living up to it. You think that that's something personal to you and it's really not.
02:00:45.94
jellyfishind
Um, yeah.
02:01:06.60
jellyfishind
Yeah, yes, have some accountability. Yeah, all of those things so important. Um, okay I don't think I have asked you this yet. What is the name of your catering company. So everyone can know.
02:01:01.44
Brandi
Um, right? yeah.
02:01:24.20
Brandi
It's cook. It's cooking with Corey yeah on Instagram cooking underscore with underscore Corey Facebook cooking Mccoy and y c.
02:01:42.22
jellyfishind
And okay, you kept it and and where can people best find you.
02:01:51.76
Brandi
And online http://wwwwdotcookcoacoury.com
02:02:08.68
jellyfishind
Um, and are you all over New York city or are you like all 5 boroughs cool. Um, well this was so nice to talk to you.
02:02:03.32
Brandi
Yeah, yeah, we cater to all five barrels yes if as
02:02:39.42
jellyfishind
You have such an incredible like view on life in the world and you're really inspiring and just yeah I like love this is such a nice conversation. Thank you for asking me questions too.
02:02:34.20
Brandi
Thank you.
02:02:50.18
Brandi
Yeah, I'm always curious about someone's story because you just never know when you look at someone they may look so well put together and you just don't know how much they've been through in their life to get to where they are. Some people have worked really hard to be. Ah, happy person I know that I have.
02:03:39.48
jellyfishind
Yeah I agree I am at storytelling I'm also I'm a storyteller sometimes I'll get up on stages and tell stories like the mall style like true personal narrative stories. Yeah and um and I think.
02:03:52.74
Brandi
Don't.
02:04:14.66
jellyfishind
First of all, it's just helped me tremendously in my life like to to be able to be vulnerable with people and to you know, become more comfortable with just who I am um but I think it's the most important thing we can do like I really believe that like telling our stories and listening to other people's stories is like.
02:04:16.24
Brandi
Yeah.
02:04:54.40
jellyfishind
I Don't know how else we get to like see other people as whole humans and if we can't see other people as whole humans and we'll never there will they'll never be equality really right.
02:04:48.36
Brandi
Writing.
02:05:02.88
Brandi
No, no you and you're right? and so and then also when you open up, you get to know people who are really really good people too. Also you know and they and they love you for it and you know we have a staff that just they adore us. They do any they do anything for us and I think that. Has a lot to do with knowing that we'll do anything for them and that we have been open and vulnerable with them. Also.
02:06:02.36
jellyfishind
Yeah, yes, vulnerability invites vulnerability. Totally.
02:05:57.52
Brandi
Yes, and you know the you know the other thing is hurt people hurt people so just making yeah just being aware Self-awareness is is big too.
02:06:22.20
jellyfishind
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's huge I can I feel like I can just talk to you for like hours but well let's talk again. Maybe you can come back after after you get married like we can hear about that. Um.
02:06:31.82
Brandi
Staying here? Yes, yeah, we could do a follow up story Corey Cory come say hi show your face.
02:07:00.96
jellyfishind
We could do a follow story. Oh yeah, Corey ah hi Corey I'm Molly. It's nice to meet you. Ah.
02:06:58.86
Brandi
He was in he was in the gym and he kind of hurt his arm. Um, Thank you Nice to me too. He's he's the Chef He makes all the food.
02:07:36.52
jellyfishind
Thanks for it. I've heard about all of your food I want to eat your mac and cheese with the grilled chicken I yeah he can hear me. Yes, next time I'm in New York I'm come by awesome. But.
02:07:34.36
Brandi
She says she wants to taste your mac and cheese with the groach again anytime a time. Okay, thanks.
02:08:13.50
jellyfishind
Ah, um, well congratulations I forgot to say tell them congratulations. But yeah and meeting me Nick Franky and the wedding the upcoming noptials.
02:08:10.86
Brandi
Oh she said congratulations on meeting me. Um. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'd love to come back and share the day with you? Yeah, all right? cool.
02:08:45.60
jellyfishind
Um I can't wait to hear and thank you so much? Yes, okay, that would be fun. We'll figure this out all right I'm going to.