n today's mini episode, Molly helps you understand why it's important to share your internal thoughts and feelings to bring about positive changes in your life. Everyone wants to be understood, but often we're afraid to share too much, or we don't know how to start. This episode will give you some easy and not-so-scary ways to start sharing your story to create a better, more connected life for yourself. Molly loves to speak in front of audiences on this topic. Click the link below to get her to speak at your next event or gathering! Molly also launched Insightful Videos: They're more than just your legacy. These are a great way to work with Molly on sharing your story in a fun, documented form that you can share with loved ones or keep for yourself to reflect on.
In today's mini episode, Molly helps you understand why it's important to share your internal thoughts and feelings to bring about positive changes in your life. Everyone wants to be understood, but often we're afraid to share too much, or we don't know how to start. This episode will give you some easy and not-so-scary ways to start sharing your story to create a better, more connected life for yourself.
Molly loves to speak in front of audiences on this topic. Click the link below to get her to speak at your next event or gathering!
Molly also launched Insightful Videos: They're more than just your legacy. These are a great way to work with Molly on sharing your story in a fun, documented form that you can share with loved ones or keep for yourself to reflect on.
For Speaking Appearances Click Here:
For Legacy Videos Click Here:
To Follow Molly on Social Media Click Here:
Works Cited:
📍 📍 📍 📍 Did you know that one of the leading causes of premature death is loneliness. So many people worry about growing older and getting dementia. When in fact the likelihood of getting dementia has been decreasing by around 25% for the last three decades.
But do you know what one of the most important preventatives for getting dementia is feeling connected to other people. Feeling connected is also an antidote to many other things like heartbreak, overwhelm, depression. And in my experience, even procrastination. So what's the reason we often don't feel connected.
And what do we do about it?
Welcome to Molly at this age, a teeny tiny version of I am this age, the podcast proving it's never too late and you're never too old. So go do that thing. You're always talking about I'm Molly Sider, a certified professional life coach storyteller, speaker, and creator of insightful videos.
It's more than just your legacy.
Most of us want to feel deeply understood and seen. But feeling fully seen can be scary. So we often only want to feel seen in a way that we can bear. Where we can control the narrative. And often the way we control the narrative is actually by not being seen at all. We put a smile on our faces when we really feel like crying. We say we're fine.
When we really feel like crap.
We don't ask for what we want. We don't say what's on our mind. We lie. We cheat. We stay silent. We stay small. We do all sorts of things to avoid other people, seeing us.
We do it because we worry that if those people knew who we really are. Like what we really believe and need they'd reflect. What we already are convinced is true about ourselves. And that often sounds something like I'm lazy, dumb, unlovable, needy, and capable, pathetic I'm bad.
And I don't know about you, but I don't need anyone to confirm my biggest fear about myself, because if it turns out that someone else also thinks I'm one of those things, Well, I might as well just end it right here. And right now,
For a really long time. I was afraid to ask questions because I feared I was the only one who didn't understand. One of my darkest beliefs about myself was that I wasn't smart. And the fact that I often had questions that no one else seemed to be asking only strengthened that suspicion. So I would stay silent, only getting my questions answered in the privacy of my home are many times not at all. Of course, this behavior only hurt my ability to learn and grow, but the worst part is that whatever I needed clarification on someone else likely needed it too.
So then there were two of us leaving, confused and feeling stupid and alone. Can you imagine how different we might've felt had. One of us found the courage to speak up.
We often think we're the only person feeling how we're feeling, but all contraire, my dear listeners. We might be unique in the details of our stories. But we're not so unique in our thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Most likely if you're feeling some way, someone else in the room is also feeling that way or has at some points. You might remember that I call myself a storyteller. And what I mean by this is that sometimes I like to get on a stage and tell true personal narratives in front of an audience of people. Or sometimes I like to tell those stories right here. And yes, it is very scary, especially when I'm sharing something deeply personal. But my experience after sharing some of these deeply personal stories has mostly been receiving handshakes and hugs from audience members who think me. Or direct messages from listeners who tell me they feel seen. And it's not the accolades that I'm seeking, although they do feel nice. It's how my shoulders and jaw relax. My breathing slows and my nervous system calms when I feel deeply connected to other people.
It's also the energy boost I receive when I'm no longer using so much of it to hide who I really am. And it's the confirmation that my story and point of view. are just one of many possibilities,.
For example, perhaps having lots of questions actually makes me smart.
But none of this takes away from the fact that sharing and vulnerability two requirements for feeling seen creating meaningful connections and combating loneliness. Are scary. And most of us have no idea how to do them. It still blows my mind that communication within meaningful relationships is not a basic part of our schools.
Curriculums. But anyway, I have some good news and some bad news. I'll start with the good.
You don't have to get on a stage to share and feel connected. There are some very simple ways to start feeling connected right now, if you want to, in fact, If, what I'm saying resonates with you, you're already doing it because one of the most important parts of sharing and connecting is actually just listening. Listening with curiosity and compassion and not just listening for the next pause for when you can add to the conversation, let's all.
Please stop doing that.
Another way to start connecting right away is to get curious and ask questions. Yes. Those little things I used to be afraid of are a wonderful way to both see and be seen. So ask lots of questions. It really does make you smarter.
It also makes you more compassionate and a lot less lonely. Go ahead. Try it. Find someone in the room. You don't know. Well, an ask them something. See what happens
DM me, what you learned. Finally practice sharing some of your internal narrative with the outside world. And if that scares you, that's normal.
Maybe start by writing it down in a journal. When you're ready find a safe person, like a therapist or a coach like me. Or if you don't have a coach or a therapist pick a friend or family member, you know, is capable of really listening without judgment or agenda. ,
The more you share your internal narrative with others, the more you'll be able to consider different perspectives and shift your beliefs about yourself and your circumstances. The more you share your internal narrative, the more your external experiences will change. The more you share, the more you connect, the less alone you feel.
And the more fun you'll have.
The bad news is all of this takes practice and the scary feeling may never completely go away. But dear listeners. It does get easier. You have my word.
Great news. If you want to learn more about this, I love to speak on this topic and would love to discuss it in greater detail with your group organization association or whatever you have in mind. Click the link in the show notes to get in touch with me. If you want to share in a more private way, I am taking coaching clients. I also have insightful videos.
It's more than just your legacy, which is a great opportunity to work with me, where I helped to pull out the meaning from your life's journey to reflect on either privately or to share with loved ones. It's up to you. And it's something you'll have forever click the link in the show notes to find out more and to connect with me.
Don't be afraid to reach out. Have I mentioned how much I love to connect?
If you're loving these episodes, please share them with one or two other people. The more we grow, the more we can help you grow. While you're at it, make sure you are subscribed and rate and write a little review. It goes such a long way. Thank you to Dan Devin for my music, David Harper for my artwork. I am. This age is produced by jellyfish industries. I'm your host, Molly Sider. See all next time.